


Coin flips are just thinly veiled fortune-telling

by ganymedejam



Series: Touch-starved Idiots [4]
Category: The Mandalorian (TV)
Genre: Angst, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, One Shot, name reveal FINALLY
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-10
Updated: 2020-12-10
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:02:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27990462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ganymedejam/pseuds/ganymedejam
Summary: Post-Chapter 12/Pre-Chapter 13. [See part 3 for some context]This is the last leg of the journey to Corvus, and Mando stops at a planet to refuel. He fights with himself about the looming choices he needs to make for the Child. You try to comfort him through it, but you're feeling on edge about the situation as well. He thanks you with a meal and opens himself up a little more to you.
Relationships: Din Djarin & Reader, Din Djarin/Reader
Series: Touch-starved Idiots [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2037154
Comments: 18
Kudos: 147





	Coin flips are just thinly veiled fortune-telling

**Author's Note:**

> This is what I originally intended to write while I was writing part 3 to this series. I'm not entirely satisfied with how this went but I just wanted some good ol' fluff and angst and bullshit domestic moments.

You arrive at the mining planet Sullyr to refuel during midday; Corvus is only a couple days’ journey away. When you touch down, The Mandalorian tucks the Child in the sling and pulls the strap across his shoulder. “Gonna head into the village to see if they have anything we might want.”

“Do you want me to come with?” you ask.

“No. I’m… alright. Just me and the kid will be fine.” His tone sounds unconvincing, like there’s something bothering him but he won’t talk about it. As much as you want to help him with whatever he’s feeling, you know that Mando has to come to it in his own time. Forcing the issue just makes him shrink away even more and he turns to ice. You noticed that his mood had been in flux through the latter half of the journey to Corvus; one moment he feels positive about what he’s doing, and then the next moment he feels so much doubt.

You had some understanding about Jedi and wielders of the Force through stories you’ve heard throughout the years, and he grilled you for every scrap of information that you could give him despite the fact that neither of you had any way of separating fact from fiction. Before long he was arguing with himself about what he felt was the right thing to do.

‘ _ He needs a master to do all of this stuff, right? Good. It’ll suit him better.’ _

_ ‘He’s just… a baby, ain’t he? He’s too young to understand all of this Force stuff.’ _

_ ‘The Armorer told me that I need to return him to his kind so that’s what I have to do. Yeah. I have to. The kid needs a place where he feels like he belongs.’ _

_ ‘But what if he doesn’t listen? He  _ likes _ me and he won’t even listen to me. What’s the Force-wielder gonna do when the kid doesn’t wanna learn?’ _

_ ‘The kid is attached to me now. I allowed that to happen. He’s a foundling now--a part of my Clan of Two. Maybe he should be with me.’ _

_ ‘No. He’s gotta go. I can’t protect him from the Imps forever. They wanted him for something and there’s somebody out there that’s probably still looking and he needs to be able to fight for himself with his weird powers.’ _

And on and on and on. The Mandalorian paced the length of the Razor Crest back and forth, ranting to you well into the night last night while the Child was asleep. You really wished that you had the right answers, and an ache of sadness burned through a hole in your chest for both him and the Child. You stood up and halted his pacing by stepping in his path and grabbing both of his wrists quickly, pulling him directly in front of you. Your hands slid down to hold his, desperate that the gesture had some kind of soothing effect.

All you could say was: “Mando, I don’t know. I really don’t. The Armorer said you were like his father now, but also you have to take him to the Jedi. You can only choose one; she  _ allowed _ you to choose.”

“What’s right?” he asked in nearly a whisper, to both you and himself. He didn’t look at you; his visor was trained on some spot behind your shoulder, it seems. You squeezed his hands in yours, and he curled his gloved fingers around yours in response and he slowly turned his helmet to look at you.

You looked up into his visor. You wished in that moment that you could see his eyes, but all you saw was the black void of the slit and the dull reflection of your own face in his helmet.

“Flip a coin,” you told him in a soft voice. “One side for each choice. Your reaction to the result is the choice you really want to make.”

“That won’t tell me what’s right.”

You shook your head at him and gave him a sympathetic smile. “But right now you’re not really thinking about what’s ‘right.’” The Mandalorian stood there, watching you, silent as ever. He rasped out a syllable of something that he wanted to say at that moment, but the word broke apart in his mouth and settled into a low groan in his throat.

You took a chance. The burning in your chest flitting like crazy, desperate to break your ribs apart. You pulled him to you and circled your arms tight around him, ushering him into the first hug you ever gave him. And he let you; he  _ let  _ you. His arms closed around your shoulders with a tentative pressure at first, but he tightened his hold when you tucked your chin against his right shoulder. Smoothing your hands across his shoulder blades didn’t actually do anything since he wouldn’t have felt it through the plating mounted on his back, but you did it anyway. You both stood in each other's arms for a long while, holding on tight like the other was going to disappear if you let up even just a little.

“Flip the coin,” you told him. “Find out what your heart really wants.” You slowly pulled away from him and he seemed reluctant to do the same but released his arms from you. You ran your hand along his bicep as another small comforting gesture.

“I wish I could help you, but it’s not my place. I’ll.. I’ll leave you to think but I’ll be around if you need me, okay?”

“Okay.” he replied quietly. You watched as the Mandalorian turned toward the ladder to the cockpit. He had one hand on one of the rungs, and you told him, "I'm here for you. You know that, right?" You carried this subtle hurt in your voice and it stung him a little to hear it and it made his own voice waver a little.

"Yeah…. I-I know." 

He made his way up the ladder to the cockpit and shut himself in there. You waited around patiently for him for about an hour or so before you started to nod off. Reluctantly, you retreated to your bedroll and went to sleep. You hoped that he would wake you up sometime during the night but he never did.

\---

While Mando went off with the Child to the village, you spent the afternoon performing a routine check on the Razor Crest to make sure everything is in top shape for the final stretch of the journey. You tried to do everything you could to keep your mind off of what was about to happen. When you first joined Mando, you didn’t know where it would lead you. He needed help with the ship and Karga had nothing but the utmost respect for the Mandalorian despite all the things that happened regarding the Child that there wasn’t a reason to not want to go along with him. There was nothing on Nevarro besides repair work; at least on the Razor Crest you’d be seeing some new places. Not that you weren’t grateful to Karga but you hadn’t been off planet for years.

But now it’s more complicated. You never wanted kids--still don’t, really--but the Child warmed your heart. You started out knowing very little about caring for a child to suddenly adapting to the tiny green creature being a part of your daily life. The Mandalorian was somehow easier to work with. You both were quiet and generally reserved. It took you both a while to warm up enough to open up a little more about each other, but after that it was like working in tandem like cogs in a machine. You ended up knowing each other somehow without needing to say anything. Little gestures spoke volumes, and honestly, you cataloged every single one in your brain to the point that you had a metaphorical library of those moments in your head.

You questioned your role, however. How much of this is Mando just needing a crewmate to help with the Crest? Or needing help caring for the Child? Did it even stretch beyond that? When he finds the Jedi and gives the Child to them, where does that leave you? The thought of not having any idea of what even part of your future holds set you somewhat on edge. You desperately hoped that he wouldn’t make you leave some day.

You got so distracted in your own melancholy that you weren’t paying attention and crossed some wires that should not have touched. You yelled a string of curses when you felt the shock, and got so pissed off at yourself that you suddenly started crying out of frustration. You took a moment to bury your face in your hands and give yourself a good few heavy sobs. Your chest heaved as large droplets of tears seemed to fill your palms. So many thoughts swirling in your mind. The kid. Mando. Your feelings. Everything was so overwhelming to manage at this point, when Corvus was so close. It dawned on you that if the Jedi that Bo-Katan told the Mandalorian was indeed still on Corvus, it would be a tipping point for everything from there. A solid ten minutes of sobbing passed before your head started swimming. You could feel your heart splintering over the possibility of losing them both so quickly. You sniveled and wiped your eyes with your sleeve then finished up the wiring work you still had to do, then headed to the fresher for a shower after you cleaned everything up.

\---

It was near dusk by the time the Mandalorian returned to the Crest. He went inside the ship to put the Child in his hammock then put away the items he purchased at the village. When you weren’t around to greet him, he called your name and looked around the ship for you and found you curled up on your bedroll with your music player next to your head. The sound of stringed instruments filled the area of the ship with a soft melody--sad music for a sad mood.

He says your name again and you snap yourself out of your daze, looking up at him bleary-eyed

“Sorry, I shocked myself and was just… taking it easy.” Mando studies your face and he knows that it’s something more than ‘taking it easy.’

“Are you hungry?” he asks, and that’s his way of asking if you’re okay.

“I could eat, yeah.”

The Mandalorian seems to shift from side-to-side restlessly. “Uh, I can cook. I bought .. something from the village. Special. For you--er,  _ us _ to eat.”

You blink at him in surprise and smiled at him, “What’s so special?”

He dodges the question and turns around to head to the cockpit. “Gonna move the ship. Just wait.”

  
  


\---

You palm the hangar switch to open the door and lower the ramp, and help the Mandalorian carry some things outside the ship. The Child wobbles his way down the ramp behind you both. “So why did we fly the Crest up to a mountain cliff to eat?”

He busies himself with setting up a fire. “Quieter out here.-- _ Don’t even think about it _ .” Mando stops what he’s doing and wags a finger in the kid’s face when the Child gets too curious about what he’s doing. The Child makes an odd burbling sound at him then wanders off to watch you haul a couple of empty crates from the ship. You place them side by side for seats near the fire, then take a seat on one and pull the kid onto your lap, and you notice that the Mandalorian has set up a roasting spit.

“Wait, did you just buy that spit  _ today _ ?”

“Yep.” he says as he pulls something wrapped in butcher paper out of his bag. Mando unwraps the package and reveals a large chunk of raw meat with a rather delicious marbling of fat. He places the bundle in his lap, takes off his gloves, and rubs some seasoning into the flesh from a little pouch he grabbed from his bag as well.

“So you bought the collapsible spit  _ and _ \--” you start to say.

“Hold this.” The Mandalorian cuts you off and offers you one end of the large metal skewer. You immediately oblige, careful to not harm the kid while doing so, and continue what you’re saying while he slides the meat onto the skewer.

“-- _ and _ the seasoning  _ and _ the meat?”

He takes the skewer from you and carefully places between the forked poles at either side of the fire.

“Impulse buy.” he responds plainly as he wipes his hands on a damp towel he’d brought from the ship.

“You’re full of shit.”

“Why?”

“The Mandalorian does not do  _ impulse purchases _ .”

You shoot him a suspicious look and he can’t help but laugh at you as he rotates the skewer carefully. It was already starting to drip, and droplets of rendered fat hissed in the fire as they fell into the flames.

“Would be the case usually, but not this time. You weren’t there in the market. The kid was drooling like crazy from the smell of the cooked meat at one of the merchant stalls.”

“Uh- _ huh _ ,” you replied.

“The meat looked good so I bought it. And I bought the other stuff to make it.” The two of you are suddenly quiet, and he turns the meat again, keeping his attention on the fire. A few moments pass and then he tilts his head to look up at you. “You don’t think that maybe I wanted to do something nice for you, too?”

You were genuinely surprised. “For  _ me _ ?”

“Yeah.”

“It’s so much trouble.” you muse. You feel a blush creeping up your neck and you thank the Maker that he can’t see it.

“You’re not…  _ it’s _ not trouble,” he mumbles.

\---

When the meat is finished cooking, you both have to force the Child to eat something else besides the meat alone. The Mandalorian picks a chunk of meat off the skewer and shreds it with his fork on the food tray that’s in his lap. He mixes a few tiny chunks of vegetables in the meat, and you spoon the mixture into a leafy green that Mando had also bought from the market that day. You wrap the mixture snugly in the leaf before hand-feeding the roll to the kid.

You chuckled as you watched him chew happily on the third roll he’s had for dinner. “Y’know, I wouldn’t have to feed you like some helpless infant if you didn’t pull the leaf apart and shove the meat in your face, ya little womp rat.”

The Child ate two more of the rolls, then Mando stood up and took the kid out of your arms. “Alright. Time for bed.” The Child cooed at Mando as he rocked him in his arms while walking back to the ship. You watched him ascend the ramp and can hear the faint one-sided conversation Mando was having with the kid.

“I gotta eat too, kid. Don’t fuss like that.  _ No _ , don’t look at me like that. You’ve been up all day.  _ Bed time now _ .”

It still takes a good twenty minutes or so to lull the kid to sleep. The Mandalorian returns and sits next to you again in front of the fire. He notices that your tray is still empty and he says matter-of-factly, “You didn’t eat yet.”

“Too busy making the kid eat. Besides, I wanted to wait for you.”

He tilts his helmet at you curiously, but surprises you with his response. “Good.”

“Good?”

The Mandalorian nods at you, then takes your tray from you and sets to work piling it high with food. “I had an idea.” he tells you softly as he hands your tray back to you. He clears his throat, trying to rid his voice of the sheepishness he feels at the moment. “We could.. Y’know, do the thing that we did when you gave me that slush drink.”

The proposition takes you aback, but in a very good way. Your heart flutters and you can’t help but smile brightly at his suggestion. “Like eat together back-to-back?”

“Yeah. I’ll uh… I can take my helmet off this time.”

“Really?”

“Yes.”

“I won’t look. I promise. Absolutely.” You chew at the corner of your lip in worry. “Are you really comfortable with that?”

“I am.”

“You really don’t have to. Don’t do something you’re not comfortable with.”

“I want to. I trust you.”

“Okay.”

“Yeah? Okay.”

  
  


You shift in your seat, turning away so that your back is to him, and you hear the scrape of utensils as he fills his own tray. He shifts behind you, and he’s moved his seat closer to you and you both are now literally back-to-back, which catches you by surprise and makes your heart lurch. The Mandalorian bends forward slightly, and you hear the hiss of his helmet as he pulls it completely off and sets it down on the ground beside him.

He doesn’t say a word as he immediately dives into his dinner. He’s honestly so hungry that he’d rather be shoveling it into his mouth, but you’re here so he takes his time. Meanwhile, you just had your first bite of the roasted meat and it tastes like heaven. The foreign spices meld beautifully with the smokiness infused in the meat, and the juicy, rich flavor of the rendered fat hitting your tongue nearly brings you to tears.

“ _ Dank farrik, _ this is so  _ good _ !” you gush.

The Mandalorian can’t help but laugh at your reaction, and he nods to himself as he mops up some of the juice from the meat with a bread roll. “It really is,” he says between mouthfuls, “Hell, it’s been so long since I had something like this.”

“Singing you praises, Mando, I swear.” you tell him, playfully bumping your shoulder against his, before helping yourself to another bite. He chuckles to himself when he hears your happy eating noises and feels the subtle way you seem to be wiggling in your seat in happiness.

  
  


\---

  
You both had finished your plates well over an hour ago, and yet you two were content with sitting by the fire and chatting with your backs pressed against each other. There was a lull in the conversation, but you were fine with just hearing the crackle of the fire that was starting to peter out. You heard him sigh tiredly behind you, and he rolled his shoulders before slumping further against you and you swear that his head is nearly resting on your shoulder now.

He broke the silence suddenly, his voice a low rumble in the dark. “What upset you today?"

"What do you mean?" you stammered.

"I came back to the Crest and you had this look in your eyes. What happened?"

You swallowed hard, pausing only because you didn't want to admit to him that you were crying earlier. "I was thinking about what might happen when we get to Corvus." Only a vague truth, but you weren't lying either.

"Do you feel any better about it?"

"No."

He sighed loudly. "Me neither. I flipped the coin last night.”

“And?”

“I know what I want…. And what I don’t want.”

“Which is?”

He pauses a beat, then tells you, “I don’t want to say just yet.” You can pick out the heaviness in his voice. The Mandalorian clears his throat, and he reaches behind until his hand finds one of yours. You shiver instantly from his touch, and he pulls your hand away from your lap with such gentleness, interlacing his fingers with yours. 

“Whatever happens with the kid. Whatever choices there are. Whatever fucking coin flip I end up hating… I--I’m just glad that you’re here with me to see it through.”

You squeeze his hand in yours and you suck in a breath, and Maker knows that you feel like your heart is about to burst out of your chest right now.

“I told you before. I’m here for you if you need me.” you tell him quietly. Mando rubs circles across the back of your hand with his thumb.

“I-I’m not good with this sort of thing.”

“What?”

“Being  _ close _ to someone.”

You chuckle sheepishly at him. “Guess we’re in the same boat. What’s next?”

The Mandalorian is quiet behind you; the silence seems to stretch torturously long as he ruminates on what to say next.

“My name.”

“Your name?”

“Din. My name is Din Djarin.”

You repeat his name back to him, sounding out the syllables carefully. Your mouth quirks into a smile as you say it again. “Din Djarin.” You can’t see it but he’s smiling too, and he squeezes your hand tight. He feels so damn warm right now--the way you say it so carefully, like you’re shaking the dust out of it from years of neglect. You hear him chuckle softly behind you as he realizes this is the first time in so fucking long that his name has been said aloud by someone who cares for him.

Maybe you're a tad lovesick, because you can't stop yourself from telling him. "Din. This is--y'know, a _gift_ and I'm so glad to know it." His heart hammers in his chest and he's practically melting on the inside. In time you'll know so much more of him--that's one thing that he's certain about. Coin flips be damned.

**Author's Note:**

> me @ myself: please for the love of god write the kiss already!
> 
> The next part will deal with what happened in Chapter 13: The Jedi, which means... more angst....


End file.
